Spring Break

Spring break brought me work in the form of the Spring Break day camp at the park district of my hometown. The entire camp only lasted five days (and I didn't even get to work during the day for two of them), but I noticed some things during the time that I got to spend there.

The campers.

With every camp, there are different kids; some of the smiling/crying/whining/angry faces are the same from the time before, while most are completely new. I usually work with the same age ranges: first thru sixth grade, making it easy to know how that group of kids reacts to certain things and how I can keep them under control. However, this time, we were told that there was a kid who was in a wheelchair- this was all we were told before he came in on the first day of camp.

When he came in the room, we found out that he also couldn't talk, didn't really have the use of his hands, and was on the "slower" side (for lack of a better term at the moment). He had a talker box that he would press buttons and it would speak for him, and a helper. As a society, at least for the most part, when we see people like this, we feel like it is easier to just do things for them, like pick up something that is across the table, or write a letter for them, but with this guy, it was a little different. He couldn't talk, walk, or perform simple tasks, so he was forced to be taken care of, but everyone who worked with him was so patient. This morning, after I parked my car in front of the building where the camp was held, before I was even able to get out, I noticed his mom taking him out of the car and putting him in his wheelchair. I could tell from the brief interaction I had with her the day before and now that his mom actually works with him, trying to make him stronger and teach him how to do things. Not only does his mom do this, but she is also very patient with him, and never did she make a face when she had to help him into his coat or when he refused to walk about four feet to his wheelchair (he could somewhat walk, but only when he was practically being carried at the same time). I saw this and wished that we could all have empathy and patience like hers, and if we had this, we would probably get more done, and learn more from others. The simplicity of letting him take his time, allow the other campers to understand him, and give him room to become involved on his own showed that doing this makes everything for that person more enjoyable and fulfilling than doing it for them.

Saying goodbye every time.

Since I'm a camp counselor during the summer and for the seasonal camps, I am used to having the children and the people that I work with walk into my life from a period of a few days to just a handful of weeks at a time, and then waving goodbye and not seeing them for half a year or longer. However, even though I am so used to this, it leaves me with an empty feeling inside each time I have to say goodbye; you are become friends with people, but only for a few hours at a time, and then you don't even think about them until you see them the next day. I like being able to have the people that I get along with become a part of my life, even if we would just FaceBook every once in a while- more than the measly eight weeks tops that I get to spend with them. The up side to this though, is that I get to meet so many different people, but nothing compares to being able to see these people later on down the road, recognize each other, and be able to have a decent conversation because you genuinely care about hearing the update from the other person. I miss the people that I've worked with, good and bad (sorta the bad), and even though I know I will most likely see them over the summer, I still feel that emptiness that comes with having to say goodbye to them after the eight weeks are up.

It's funny, because I sometimes complain that it is exhausting to be around the kids in the camp and have to put in as much energy as I do into the day, but when I think about it, I realize that I really like it. Would I give up spending my summer days with the campers? No, I get to act like a kid when I'm around them, and I feel like I fit in with that age group better than my own anyways. Would I change the people that I work with every day? No, we've become a family. We know each other's weaknesses and where to help each other out, and we know where each other excels, and who does what the best. The parts that I don't like are the temper tantrums and not seeing the children and peers that I worked with until a year later, or not even at all after that camp. However, I get to learn from the people I work with, the parents, and the children that make up the camp. With all this: the complaining, the energy, and things that I put up with throughout the day, would I change my job? I leave this with a resounding no, I wouldn't change it at all.

The Price of Beauty Part 1

Jessica Simpson's The Price of Beauty

In this show, Jessica travels to a number of countries in order to learn what beauty, beauty for women, means in the different cultures. She is accompanied by her hair, makeup, and clothing stylist, Ken Paves, along with her friend CaCee Cobb. In each location that they travel to they have a "Beauty Ambassador," who teaches them about the definition of beauty in that country. The show is 30 minutes long, which means about 20 minutes of actual footage- let's see how the show goes...

Episode 1: Thailand

In the season opener, Jessica goes to Thailand with two friends, and the first thing that they do is get a Thai massage (this is supposed to help one have better posture). Then, they check in with their Beauty Ambassador, who takes them around a local flea market, tells them that eating bugs speeds up a person's metabolism. Next, the Ambassador talks about makeup, and tells them how having pale skin something that is wanted because being tan shows that you are a worker. In order to further her explanation of this and point out how bad this is for a person, she takes them to see a woman whose skin has been destroyed by chemicals that is used to bleach skin. After this, they go and meet with a Buddhist monk, who teaches the three of them that a true Buddhist believes that beauty comes from within. The last thing that they do, is visit the Karen tribe, where the women wear rings around their necks in order to elongate them, which is a sign of beauty and wealth. The three of them "try out" this ritual to understand it, and also get to see a girl having the rings put on for the first time.

My take:

This episode has a very slow start, with the continuing joke of how Jessica keeps wearing high heels, which if you watched the show, you would understand why it is humorous, but ridiculous at the same time. The first thing they do is get a massage, which might be part of the beauty regimen for women, but was unnecessary to the show and didn't really teach the audience anything about the culture. Throughout most of the episode, the three of them are giggling about the things that they are doing which comes off as somewhat offensive, with somewhat fleeting moments of them really taking everything in and understanding what it is that they are being taught. (However, surprisingly Ken is the only one who seems to be respecting the culture the most, having to shush the girls at some moments and being respectful of the people that they meet.) At the end of the episode, I feel like they begin to respect what they are doing and being shown, which is a good sign. I wish the episode was longer, and that they were able to do/show more things, but we can't have everything.

Well, we'll see what happens tomorrow night.

Sorry, I cannot hear you I'm kinda busy.

Finals week.

I've been walking around this entire week pretty much zoned out, not paying much attention to the people that I am friends with, and the people and things that I am surrounded by. I've been distracted by books, exams, and papers all for the sake of making that last grade count and not ruining the work that I have done all quarter and the points that I have racked up. But, on the way to the post office earlier this week, I realized that outside of myself, people are disconnected not because of finals, but because of technology.

Our necessity to be plugged into our MP3 players, our phones, computers, etc. is stopping us from looking around and seeing the things that are going on around us. When I was walking to the post office, music playing in my ears, I noticed a man walking towards me with his iPod playing in his too. We made eye contact, but I realized after we passed each other, that we weren't actually aware that we each "acknowledged" the other. Why was this? Because not only were we focused on getting to our destination, but we are distracted by the technology that now controls us.

I thought inventions and this growth of knowledge was supposed to be a good thing...

As distracting as technology and the new forms of communication are, it is tricky to try and narrow down whether or not its good or bad. While our cell phones allow us to keep constant communication with others, it also disconnects us. Our phones now allow us to check FaceBook, buy music and clothing with just the press of a button, text, and check emails among many other things. However, the second that we are in an area where our phone says "NO SERVICE" we are immediately cut off from the world that we knew, and have to relearn how to cope with our new surroundings without our security blanket. These issues don't only apply to the portable tech, but also the not-so-portable ones. We get back to our homes, and we sit down in front of a flashing computer, tv, etc. screen, causing us to communicate through another form of artificial communication instead of talking face to face. We would rather be able to sit in our pajamas IMing someone than visit them, substituting a blinking cursor for a real face. Too many times have I IMed someone who was just down the hall from me; it's too easy to sit in one place and be able to talk to five different people at once instead of getting up and visiting them.

We are surrounded by real people, but are alone at the same time because we don't know how to talk or act around others, all thanks to the technology that has stripped us of these social skills. Our generation has learned that friendship and talking mainly involves texts and FaceBook statuses, instead of the phone call off a land line or a doorbell ringing due to a visit from a friend.

So what are we going to do when we get home after our day? We're going to unplug one device for another. Goodbye MP3 player, hello iTunes and FaceBook.

Lady Gaga - Telephone

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EVBsypHzF3U&feature=PlayList&p=C4B9C7326E087E89&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=1

Please Don't Leave Me.

[It takes time for us to find out who we are and need to be in order to have a good relationship with another person, but sometimes we lose ourselves along the way.]

We go into a relationship hoping that this time will be different, that it has to be better than the last. Every time it is the same; we like or even love a person, and make room for them in our lives so that they can be a part of who we are. Even though our intentions might be good, we usually end up losing a piece of ourselves, and sometimes several pieces that we might never be able to get back. Slowly, we can end up losing who we are, and what makes us the person we once were.

The way we hurt.

We put up with ideas, words, actions that we wouldn't put up with normally. If a friend were to do the same thing that the person you adore does, you probably wouldn't let it slide with the friend, but you would for the person you like just because you don't want to mess anything up. I know I have heard jokes, seen actions that I didn't like, but allowed it to slip by unmentioned because I didn't want to highlight the bad and stop liking the person, or worse, them stop liking me. That belief that you don't agree with, the comment on how you can't cook well, that slap across the face, all of this passes by "unnoticed" because you've become passive and don't want to rock the boat; it'll only happen this once, so it doesn't matter.

The things we sacrifice.

We stop being the person we are in order to fit whatever mold we think the other person will like. We give up little pieces of ourselves; change our hair, clothes, lifestyles, job opportunities, and even personalities. We stop talking to the people close to us because the significant other doesn't approve/like them, or they don't like the significant other. We cut ourselves off from people who could possibly end the romance that you've grown used to. We stop talking to friends and family, just to protect something that probably isn't healthy or won't last forever, given the fact that you've given up what brings you joy in order to fit into a less-happy mold.

The way we change.

We change by becoming quiet, depressed, angry, and any other feeling that isn't part of our normal vocabulary of emotions. Becoming a different person to please the other person is what we end up doing, but we hurt ourselves in the process. The other person is happy, but we are not, and we have become a shell of what used to be there; all that is left is a smile on the outside.

I just want to say before the end of this entry, that this doesn't always happen; relationships can be beautiful, but those are the relationships that we don't have to sacrifice who we truly are for. Relationships can be hard, and there is work involved, however, giving our own happiness for someone else's and losing ourselves is not what someone who truly loves you would, or ever should want.

Pink - Please Don't Leave Me

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eocCPDxKq1o

I'm Only Me When I'm With You.

"Well, who is the real you?"

"That's a good question..."

We all do it, we all act differently around different people, and in different situations. While around my close and/or best friends I am my goofy self, while at work I try to make sure I don't say the wrong thing, while around children I revert to my child-self where anything is possible, when I'm around someone I like I'm awkward, and around my family I'm quiet. Each situation, each person, every different surrounding that we come across and interact with brings out a different piece of us. This leads me to think: does anyone really know the real me?

There are so many different faces that each of us have, that it would be hard just to describe ourselves in a handful of words, let alone one sentence. I feel like there are so many different sides to who I am, that it would be hard for me to even figure out where to start. My likes are fairly simple: I like horror movies and bright colors, I like talking to my friends and hanging out with them, I like to flirt, and I like to laugh. All of these are things I enjoy, but does this really say anything about me? Can I be defined by my interests? No. While I am with my friends, I am loud, I am always cracking jokes and laughing, acting like a goofball, and usually not thinking before I act. When I am at work, 95% of the time I am thinking about my actions and words before I do and say them so that nothing is taken the wrong way. When I am with my family, I am quiet and keep to myself. So I go from loud and laughing to quiet, hmm...

The majority of the time spent with my friends is filled with lame jokes that I say, while there are times when I can sit down and have a heartfelt, thoughtful (almost philosophical) conversation with them. I feel like a lot of people don't know that I have actual thoughts, because this doesn't happen with a lot of my friends, and this adds to who I am/am not. I am thoughtful to my close friends, but not, and only a funny friend to others. I'm not offended because they don't see all of me, and so I understand how they see me in just that light.

Even through picking myself apart, if everyone sees me differently, how am I supposed to view myself? Do I act a certain way around myself just like I do with my friends and family? That's probably the biggest question posted in this entry.

I challenge you to look at yourself in the mirror for longer than the thirty seconds it takes to apply that mascara or the hair gel, and think about you who are. Think about what makes you you, and what that means to yourself.

Taylor Swift - I'm Only Me When I'm With You

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AlTfYj7q5gQ&feature=related